teenager to twenty three

ripped out all my vocal cords, now im muted

i wish you had just gotten me executed

you gave me things i never deserved

anxiety, pain, and your twisted words

suffocating when you’re in the room

your presence feels like a living tomb

you say im a burden,

that im too much

but then you drink poison

and say im not enough

when in reality you’re the one you didn’t love

you wish i was never born

its you that i had to mourn

you come with gasoline, spark in hand

watch me burn wherever i had to stand

took out my voice; leave me no sound

you hate me, but you built my ground

you light the fire, then walk away

im left to pick up the ruins day after day

you gave me pain i didn’t need

a brain that makes me fucking bleed

i get claustrophobic when you’re around

my sanity is lost its nowhere to be found

i crave the void, but still, i fight

the pain feels wrong, but you tell me its right

this isn’t a plea for help; it’s a call for peace

take this sick joke and grant me release

butterflies turned into knives

inside my rib cage

how do i survive

when you wont change

they say it takes time to be wise

but im at an older age

living it all over twice

you must’ve skipped a page

at least ill thrive

while you’ll just grow deranged

thank god im almost out

im ready to feel sane

im over it

7/19/2018

6/21/2024